Simon and Helen Director Park is only a block from Pioneer Courthouse Square, but it resonates to a completely different vibe. Quieter, and somehow more private, sunlight shines down between the FOX tower and the Paramount Hotel to illuminate the park with surprising warmth. In the shadow of the buildings the brisk breeze sucks away the heat, and steals napkins and wrappers that aren’t held down.

The park is populated with folks on lunch break. They’ve brought their brownbags, snagged a cup of tomato-orange soup at Elephant’s Deli, or a gourmet hamburger at Violetta, and they eat in the sun while still bundled for the chilly temperatures. Winter hats frame sunglasses, and sensible leggings are worn under short skirts. It’s not warm, by any stretch of the imagination. But it’s warm enough, just barely enough, to sit outside for lunch because you can’t stand being trapped inside for another day.

The fountain is now in operation, and the cleverness of its design is become apparent. What first seemed to be a low semi-circular bench is now the edge of the reflecting pool, a pool clearly intended to be easily accessible to all, and which is already a magnet for small children.

Gradeschoolers move across the park. They’re chaperoned in small packs, hopping up and over obstacles, instead of walking around them. One boy proclaims to his buddies “I got skillz!”, and none of his homies contradict him. They are a burst of noise and life threading through the noontime diners.

It’s a beautiful day. It’s a beautiful park. You can purchase slow food from a van, admire the public art, and enjoy a break from work in an indubitably pleasant public space.

It’s another spring day in Portland.

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Sounds like a children’s book, doesn’t it?

Well, it’s not.

OK raise your hands if you’ve seen/ are a fan of Facebook’s “Portland was built on an ancient unicorn burial ground” ?

Mmm-hmm. That’s what I thought.

The claim is:  “It is common knowledge, that Portland Oregon was built on an ancient unicorn burial ground, and is clearly why Portland is as artistic and magical as it is.” I have evidence that it is getting out of hand!

Apparently EVERYONE in Portland is inspired by Unicorns.

Perhaps this masterpiece was put there to show that no aspect of Portland has been untouched by the magic of the ancient unicorns.

Whatever it is… do you really want a Thug Unicorn in your neighborhood?

…

Well… I do kind of like it there.  It makes me giggle.

Still, let’s get one thing straight — this doesn’t mean I’m becoming a member of  “Portland was built on an ancient unicorn burial ground”.

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Anamorphic Pinhole Series~5 by donpyle~pdxpixs

Everyone is invited to share Portland photography with the OurPDX community by participating in the OurPDX Flickr group.

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The ride is called The Screamer by abrahamhyat

Everyone is invited to share Portland photography with the OurPDX community by participating in the OurPDX Flickr group.

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smoke by RebeccaPollard

Everyone is invited to share Portland photography with the OurPDX community by participating in the OurPDX Flickr group.

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Ah, Portland!

How I love thee and thou’st eclectic ways! Your people make you who you are, which makes living here that much more delightful. Well, when they are delightful. The bikes, Elvis, the beer (ok, not eclectic but it’s a great thing about PDX), the stores and on and on the list goes.

Well, to help PDX wave its Freak Flag high and proud, Fast Wonder has launched their new site, The Crazy Neighbor. The Crazy Neighbor is here for all to share your photos of crazy neighbors across this fair city of ours. From signs posted to elaborate porch/ front lawn… um… decorations (I use the term loosely), they want to spread the word of the crazy neighbor in your area. The more you contribute, the more fun you have sharing in the kooky that is your neighborhood!

If you’d like to contribute (and I already have a few I’m willing to share) just click here to upload your pictures and details.

I’m VERY much looking forward to seeing more pictures to make me smile and giggle such as this one:

A great sample from The Crazy Neighbor.

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I did not believe in Santa when I was a little girl. For some inexplicable reason, my parents told my brothers and me that there was no such thing as Santa Claus. We did not hang our stockings by the chimney with care. We did not write letters to or leave cookies for the Jolly Fat Man. I looked upon my misguided schoolmates with pity as they spent the months of November and December trying ever-so-hard to make the Nice List. I can remember very clearly telling my friend Dianna that her mom and dad had been pretending to be Santa all these years. We were sitting on the story-time carpet of our 1st grade classroom and the poor girl burst into tears. She was so upset that she had to leave school early that day.

I know better now. Santa is real. I actually met the real Santa a few years ago while driving around looking at Christmas lights with my parents. We had just been by the Governor’s mansion in Salem and were heading back into town when we spotted Santa in the Dunkin’ Donuts on South Commercial. This required some further investigation — so we turned into the parking lot to get a closer look just as Santa was putting for four big boxes of doughnuts into his sleigh. You can’t fool Santa. He knew we were watching him and he came over to our car and gave us each a small candy cane and wished us a Merry Christmas! Let me tell you — this Santa erased any doubt I may have had in regards to his existence. He had a beautiful red velvet suit adorned with jewels and jingle bells, a real beard of snowy white. When he laughed his belly shook like a bowl full of jelly and his eyes twinkled knowingly. He was the embodiment of Peace on Earth, Goodwill towards Men. Even my non-believing parents were in awe.

See? If this man is not the real deal, I don’t know who is.

The days before Christmas are very busy for Santa. He is up at the North Pole supervising a bunch of unruly toy-making elves which I can’t imagine is very easy or fun. I’m sure he’d rather be out and about with the masses, spreading holiday cheer – but he is just not able to be everywhere at once. So Santa employs a small army of doppelgangers to be all of the places Santa would be if he could be. He saves the most jolly and bright for the most important job of all – the Shopping Mall Santa.

That being said, all Shopping Mall Santas are not created equally. In fact, the quality can vary quite dramatically which I find a little bit fascinating. So, as public service to you and as a way to satisfy my own curiosity — I’ve decided to visit all the local Shopping Mall Santas and document my findings.

First up – Clackamas Town Center Santa

Here is a photo of their Santaland:

It’s pretty big, actually. At the entrance there is one of those fun house mirrors which may seem like a good idea but if you are trying to primp a little before being immortalized for time and eternity with Santa, this mirror is of absolutely no use. But the space itself is pretty wide open and not at all claustrophobia inducing, which is helpful for those of us who don’t queue well.

Santa sits in a big green chair in front of a big green tree which does not make for a lot of visual interest. There is no contrast. If it were me, I would want my photo taken in front of the faux fireplace. It’s just cozier. You will have to check with Santa’s photo elves to see if this is possible. You may have to ask twice if you know what I mean.

Santa himself is very kind and welcoming but he seems a little shy. He is not a chatty Santa. He may or may not ask you what you want for Christmas. For those little ones who are also shy, this might be a bit of a blessing. Santa is not going to get all up in your business by asking a lot personal questions. He already knows anyway, so why rub it in?

Here is a picture of a little baby posing with Santa. (Note to self: People find it a little creepy when complete strangers take photos of their children posing with Santa. Work on being more inconspicuous.)

Once your visit with Santa is over, you are handed a pair of paper elf ears that sit upon your head like a Burger King crown. This is a nice touch but absolutely not a substitute for a candy cane. You may want to bring a candy cane from home.

All in all, Clackamas Town Center is not a bad Santa experience by any means. If you are crunched for time and this is the nearest Santa, you will not be disappointed. But if you are looking for something magical — you can do better.

And Mrs. Santa might want to add some OxyClean to Santa’s suit next time she does laundry. I’m just saying.

Coming up next? Lloyd Center Santa… stay tuned.

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at Pioneer Courthouse Square. That’s a bold fashion statement.

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They left out snow… by jbreweral2or

Everyone is invited to share Portland photography with the OurPDX community by participating in the OurPDX Flickr group.

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Silver Dude on the Bus by gregraisman

Everyone is invited to share Portland photography with the OurPDX community by participating in the OurPDX Flickr group.

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